Wrote this lyric from in the bed wit’ a chick
She had the tightest grip around the head of my…
…Bic. Now, can I get my pen back?

MF Doom, “Batty-Boys,” Born Like This, 2009. More quotes from MF Doom…

They’d rather see me fail than succeed,
That’s why I’m alone on my own with no team.
Don’t need no green, though I got some to spend;
In the end…all I really need is a friend.

Bishop Nehru, “So Alone,” from Bishop Nehru + MF DOOM’s NehurvianDOOM, 2014

There’s four sides to every story…
If these walls could talk, they’d probably still ignore me.

Viktor Vaughn, aka MF Doom, “Lickupon,” Vaudeville Villain, 2003. More MF Doom quotes…

The motto goes: Sex, Drugs and Rock ‘n’ Roll.
I prefer: Love, Hugs and Hip-Hop Soul.

Zev Love X (aka MF Doom), “Figure of Speech,” from K.M.D.’s Mr. Hood, 1991. More MF Doom quotes…

Listenin to nothin, takin no suggestions,
All destructive criticisms that can’t improve on perfection.

MF Doom is Viktor Vaughn, “The Drop,” Vaudeville Villain, 2003

Nowadays, the game is all bugged out,
Phony, like back when Hammer tried to come thugged out.

MF Doom, “Foolish,“ from MF Grimm’s Downfall of Ibliys: A Ghetto Opera, 2002

Raise your right palm: We do solemnly swear
To stack more dough more calmly this year.

MF Doom, “Get ‘Er Done,” from Jake One’s White Van Music, 2008

Catch a throatful from the fire vocal
Ashing and molten glass like Eyjafjallajökull.

MF Doom, “Guv’nor,” from JJ Doom’s Key to the Kuffs, 2012

Scared of a bunch of water? Then get out the rain.
Order a rapper for lunch, and spit out the chain.

MF Doom, “Sofa King,” from Danger Doom’s The Mouse and the Mask, 2005

You could either ignore this advice, or take it from me:
Be too nice, and people take you for a dummy.

MF Doom, “Deep Fried Frenz,” MM.. Food, 2004

Uh oh, it’s beer o’clock, I think I’m sober.
How about we think this over, over a can of King Cobra?

Viktor Vaughn, “Raedawn,” Vaudeville Villain, 2003

Golly, he’s just a pest and your worst best friend,
Who mend and rip space-time fabric like polyester blend.

MF Doom, “Biochemical Equation,” from Wu-Tang Meets Indie Culture, 2005

Only in America could you find a way to make a healthy buck,
And still keep your attitude on self-destruct.

MF Doom, “Rhymes Like Dimes,” Operation Doomsday, 1999

A lot of crews like to act like a violent mob,
They really need to just shut the fuck up like Silent Bob.

Viktor Vaughn, “Saliva,” Vaudeville Villain, 2003